hello again!

how was the maths exam everyone? i think it was different from all the past years. if fennie didn't ask me about the maximum and minimum point without having to use differentiation i would have left the 6th or 7th question (if i am not mistaken) blank. to be honest i didn't forget how to do the differentiation but without practice i would have 90% chances of getting that question wrong. overall it was not that bad. i've already predicted that we will meet about last years condition. i thought it all over yesterday night, how i will go wrong and how my marks will go backwards and not forward. to be honest it was rather sadistic, i sorted of just buried myself will all those suffocating six foot amount of problems. i finished the questions at about an hour. the moment i finished it i almost threw the pen down on the floor. frustration was just building up. i don't know why it happens and it was not as if i didnt know how to do the questions at all but i was frustrated because my prediction was right, cambridge changed their style of questions again. and again it happened in our year. i was not really sure if my answer was correct or not. but no matter what it is i hope sincerely that it will not happen in our physics question. i don't have enough preparation to do any changes they put out in physics. not to mention that i actually failed my first ever physics test when i was form 4. i don't want it to ever happen in my life again. i just hope that there will be no changes in physics paper.

yesterday i even tried 2001 and 2002 bio papers. i found out that i actually forgotten a lot of things that i studied before, my prediction for my exams this year will be doom, doom and more doom. arghhh...... what is it that is actually affecting me? i can't pinpoint myself to anything right now, if i find the source i will terminate it immediately. i keep saying to myself, chia shing, chia shing, this is your last shot whether you like it or not, do your best just do your best. then when i am really really down, you know what i do? i actually took out all the presents you all gave me before i went back to penang. and i looked at it, and it somehow gave me comfort. most of them are jewelleries but the best things of all that i received were memories in which all those small gifts were given. i remember when i got my desk, the first thing i did was arrange those gifts in the top drawer. when mom saw it, she asked..
''wasn't this drawer supposed to be filled with stationeries and not jewelleries?''
i just told her that i did not have any place else to put them so i put them there. at that time, i didn't fully understand my actions but somehow, i only came to find out that they were actually put there to secure my memories with all of you, somehow i unconciously put them there because i wanted to be reminded that all of you were supporting me from a distance. a support that is so close yet so far. i thank you all of you for giving me that and i hope that in this post i can remind you all that you have all the best of luck from me.

oh yea, just wanna tell you all that i will be having my driving test on the next friday! hope i pass, really really hope i pass!

anyway got good news, i will be going back by december. not sure when but when i book my flights, i'll inform you all straight away. and lastly and the most important thing of all, do not slack (haha, i noe a bit harsh), study hard and smart, push yourself over your limits and get the best grade that you can have! good luck everyone!

ps: thanks supa, i will try my best but i know that you'll be studying a lot more harder than me, just noe that i'll be supporting you all the way until you earn you medical degree! luv you.

ps: for yuki. thanks for wishing me good luck on the phone. you too, earn your A1s so you don't give me any reason to crush you wen you say you got A2 nia... haha just kidding, good luck get thise A1 for all of us! (hehe, no pressure given...just do your best)