"mary, long time no see", i raised my tawny head and realized that it was him, he came back, my first and probably the last one who filled my heart and soul.. the familiar strong slavic features, the lush thickness of his lips tilted at the corners for a leeway of a smile...

"why didnt u give me a call before u came here?" i asked, he shrugged.

"would you have agreed to meet with me if i did, mary?"

i stared down into those fathomless eyes of his... his dark brown irises speckled with yearning.. it chipped at me inside... then i turned away and started to walk towards my apartment... suddenly he took a step forward and reached out for my arms..

"look at me, mary, we still haven't solved this between us"

"jason, please, let the past be the past... there are no us now.. just let me go" he turned me around, using those strong callused fingers i know so well to tilt up my face, forcing me to look at him in the eyes..for awhile i lost myself there... yearning for what he could give me, yet i was afraid of reaching out to him, for what i could have had or would have with him if i just gave my feelings a chance to grow and mature... yet the unknown sparked up my fear again and again, forcing me to turn my face aside..

"mary.." he leaned his forehead against my temple, i could feel his breath down the collar of my workclothes. i laid my hands on his chest, intending to push him away. But at once it felt as if my hands was paralyzed to the feel of his deep chest, the warm baritone that caused his chest to rumble...
"let me go jason...please do it right now..."he clasped me tighter into his arms seeming to be more and more reluctant to release me as each second passed... then coldness, my body felt the loss of his comfortable heat. he looked at me in the eyes once more and tipped his hat in a mock then smiled that mischievious grin of his before he strode away from me... but not before i caught the sad look in his eyes, as he slowly walked away from my cowardice in silence...

excerpt from iridescence

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