i wonder... and yesterday's event!

i haven't written anything at all in a long time... but sometimes i wonder if i can get away from the past, discard them in one go and still stay sane for the rest of my life... times like this i think back, get memories that haunts me from where i am, what i'm doing... will i ever get pass the fact that things happened just because fate decides this is for me? Sometimes when i ponder over stuff, i start to think, perhaps too much knowledge about a person's life is not such a good thing at all... its better to stay ignorant and stupid... that way, you will not take a coward's way out of life, you will never associate something pure with evil... you will just live.. i feel like a dried up prune sometimes... unable to love, unable to hate, unable to rationalize things that i should do in the first place... many times, i asked myself... what is stopping you, why are you stucked? but perhaps no one knows the answer better than i do... but the question that really suck is "how?", how to solve it? and can i solve it?

but when i think things back, i think of where i am now... i am actually much happier here than before... for the first time in a year, i finally start to live again, but i haven't really start to feel yet... i think maybe time will heal that part of me... but i know more than ever, that is just wishful thinking, it's just an abstract thought... but for now... i am happier... that must be enough... i told gwen about it and i think i feel happier... just happier...
okay, forget that crap... yesterday morning i finally started to read my CSA and managed to finish a little stuff in the morning... at 11am, gwen texted me and said she finally finished her charity run... so i went to the usual routine when i am going out... packed some essential items into my bag and just made a dash for the bus stop at 11.50... i actually thought i was going to be the late one... funny thing is, gwen turned out to show up later than me... so it was kind of a relief somehow.. anyway, the bus was supposed to show up at 12, and another one should show up at 12.30... turns out the bus at 12 was already 45minutes late... so when we showed up at kajang ktm it was already 1.15pm... and the teller was sitting at the counter lazily handling the customers their ticket and lazily counting the change for the tickets... so we missed the first train... the second train was half an hour late... and when we boarded it, we were squished like canned sardines. the thing i don't like about ktm is that at some stops, they will cut off the aircond and start to recharge the train... then we would be stucked in between a few walks away from our destination and ending up sweating like pigs in the end... not a good idea if you are not wearing any deodorant and when the next person to you is exposing their armpits coz they are holding on to the top safety handler... awkward*-*

anyway, when me and gwen arrived at midvalley, we rushed like nobody's business to gelato... coz we already made a pact that no matter what is the situation, we would first buy ice-cream and then go to the theater later... so we did and with the ice-cream perching crazily in our grasp, we ran again upstairs to find the theater... luckily the boys who were waiting there already bought our lunch from McD...gwen kept the food in her backpack, and i kept the two drinks in mine... i asked gwen then"how are we going to get our ice-cream into the theater?"
" that is a good question..."
i forgot to tell her to lower her ice-cream down, so that it doesn't show that visibly when we pass the ticket checking area...so the guy there said"no foods allowed..."
i was like"what the hell", coz the show was already starting... the rest of them just went in first and only ziwei waited for me and gwen to finish the ice-cream... so sweet... haha
anyway, the first taste of ice-cream was still ok, but when u have consecutive bites of them with only a few seconds apart, that is when the icy feeling gets freaking unbearable and i was walking up and down, to and fro just to dissipate the coldness... that is what i call -- brainfreeze...haha, in a way it was kind of fun...
you will understand why i called it brainfreeze... coz what i did was kind of stupid... the thing is that when i went into the theater, only then did i notice that my bag was wet and i was like "This is so going to be hard to wash off later..." and i smelled the drink... it was my milo... sigh... i ended up smelling like chocolate for the rest of the day... and sorry theater... i spoiled ur carpet with a blotch... hehe, but i don't have any remorse about it...i am so bad...

anyway, we watched harry potter part 1 yesterday... surprisingly it improved...A LOT!!! coz before i even stepped into the theater i expected it to suck like nothing else... but i must say, they really did build the content up to the book's standard already... if not, i'll still be moaning away about how bad it was... haha

That night, we had a car bump into ziwei's bumper and it just drove away without stopping by to see the damage. luckily there were no scratches on the car... if there was then he would have to go to the police station and report the incident already... we later went for an impromptu tong sui late night supper... we chatted and it was actually fun to see the boys and gwen joking around... it really felt like a great friends-only outing. and together it made a perfect ending for the day... the only thing that i can say is, wow...

Nikki signing out........ me and gwen wearing the same kind of shoes--taken yesterday...

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